Mother’s day might not be a happy day for all women. In fact, there may be some women who are, for whatever reason, estranged from their children or their may be children estranged from their mothers. For these people, watching happy families on Mother’s day can be quite painful. There is no doubt that the pain that is felt through and by these broken relationships or the injustices caused one to another is real. But this Mother’s day, begin to give yourself the gift of letting go. Let go of the pain, the anger, and the resentment, and begin to pray for forgiveness.
This is not an easy task. Withholding anger concerning your expectations of someone turns into resentment. Holding on to resentment makes you feel justified. However, there is documentation stating that resentment and unforgiveness can make you physically sick. It could even shorten your life. Resentment can cause depression, change blood pressure, and heart rate. Resentment releases stress hormones and maintaining that resentment can cause permanent physiological damage. In short, holding on to resentment causes more damage to you than the person you are angry at.
It is difficult to forgive someone who does not admit they are wrong or who has not asked to be forgiven. Pray that God softens your heart, and if you can pray for nothing else pray that God gives you what I call the “want tos.” “Lord help me to ‘want to’ forgive,” and try to remember when you too needed forgiveness.
Often the chance of reconciliation grows dimmer as the distance grows greater. At times it might feel like it is just easier not to try. If you are the person that needs forgiveness approach the one that you have hurt in a humble manor. Pray often to God to forgive you and to heal the relationship as you continue to try to reconcile. Also, forgive yourself. Barbara Ingersoll, known as Gram in our Inspirations/Generations podcast, said it took years for her to forgive herself for what she had done to her children. You must learn to forgive yourself as well.
Forgiveness can still happen after the death of a loved one. Once again pray that God heal the relationship. Nothing is too big for God. He can heal even through death. This will allow you to let go, and in turn it will give space in your heart for other blessings.
Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, with all malice, and be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
Mongeon is a writer, sculptor, and speaker https://creativesculpture.com